Last night's dream 9/24/09

Last night I dreamt that Rosebud, Nigel and I went to the roller rink. Nigel had on a pink tutu and pink roller skates with laces that lit up. He had on a little sleeveless vest and on the back it said "Jersey Girl". Rosebud had on black roller blades with chains and nail heads and other tough looking accoutrement. I had on torn jeans and a sports bra, matching Jersey Girl sleeveless vest (I had to. Nigel begged me and when I tried to explain that I thought it was "sissy" clothes his puzzled little face broke my heart and I put the dang thing on.). Rosebud was supposed to be wearing one too, at Nigel's request, but she balled it up and stuffed it between the seats of the car and told Nigel that aliens had stolen it. He was super impressed! So, we are at the roller rink and Rosebud starts playing roller derby and knocking over anyone who stands in her way, which tended to be me and Nigel. After I had been knocked down three times by my darling girl and was beginning to develop bruises I decided to put an end to it. "Rosb..." I began as she flew past me. "Rosebu..." I got out on the next pass. "ROSEBUD!" I yelped as she grabbed Nigel's arm and shouted, "Whip me Sissy Boy, Whip me!" "MOOOOOMMMMMMM!" Nigel yelled not knowing what a whip or a sissy boy was. I skated over as fast as I could and scooped Rosebud up. As tough a derby queen as she is you'd think something as simple as being held would be blase for her. Oh no. Not so. Somewhere in her past lurks a dark secret of some awful offense associated with being held. The nails dig in, she squirms as if she's being tazered, she wails like a...well, I don't know...I've never seen wailing like Rosebud's. "It's okay, it's okay..." I try to soothe her. She digs the nails into the flesh of my unprotected shoulder a little more. "Rosebud...it's okay....really...I just think we need to take a little break..." I skate over to the edge of the rink as quickly as I can and set her down on the carpeted area outside the rink. She immediately starts to sharpen her claws and looks at me highly insulted. I open a can of wet food and scoop it into their bowls and place them near the cats. Nigel digs in snorting like a pig. Rosebud sniffs and starts to slink away but then she sniffs again and actually decides to grace us with a little eating. Five minutes later she throws up all over the carpeted floor. I take off the Jersey Girl vest and clean it up while the roller rink owner glares at me and my inter species offspring. "ROOOLLLLEEERRRRRR COOOOMMMMPPPPEEEETTTIITTTIIIIOOOONNNNNNN!" announces a voice over the loud speaker. Nigel and Rosebud leap up and Rosebud says, "You remember the routine, right Nigel?" and Nigel shakes his head vigorously then whispers to me, "What does "routine" mean, Mom?" before Rosebud grabs his paw and the two of them head out to the floor. A popular Lady GaGa song begins to play and Rosebud and Nigel perform an awesome skate/dance that includes leaping, spinning, wrestling and licking each others butts. The crowd goes wild! The two of them win the big trophy and $500.